Mind over Matter

I took a bazillion month hiatus but I'm back. I know you missed me....right?



So I've lost my mind and I'm running a half marathon on March 10th. The insane part isn't running the 13 miles. Insanity comes into the mix when I'm running 13.something miles extremely unprepared. By this point in my training I should be accomplishing long runs at least 10 miles long. Go ahead and guess how long my longest long run was....go ahead..



6.something miles. Not.even.half.way.



THAT’S IT! I've lost my mind. However, I'm coming to believe this is a mind over matter type deal. Stay with me with my next couple of thoughts because it's going to be a windy road. I don't know how he feels about this but I'm going to go ahead and blog about it. My dad was diagnosed with cancer recently. He is currently wrapping up his first week of some heavy duty treatment. Mix of chemo and radiation therapy. (Insert sarcastic remark) Now if that isn't a good time I don't know what is.(End of Sarcasm) I was able to keep him company on Wednesday during his busy day of appointments. One of the most important things that we can be doing collectively to help his treatment is to keep a positive outlook during this process. I'm not going to lie...its tough.  I watched so many people going through the same thing Dad is going through.  Each person in that hospital is a warrior, an athlete in their own way.  They have more courage and forgive me, balls, than I will ever have.  Their inner endurance, stamina, strength is better than Bruce Jenner in the 80’s.  I have a million thoughts going through my mind and I'm having a hard time putting it into words.



Stay with me.



It's easy to give up when your negative about things. It's easy to say it’s never going to work, that I may never make it to the finish line. They say nothing good ever came easy. I don't know who "they" are but I'm going with it. "They" must be smart or nobody would quote "they". I just lost my train of thought. "Footloose" just came on my Pandora station and I started dancing. Sorry. So back to my training part of the story.  If my Dad can run his marathon of treatments (metaphorically speaking), then I know I can finish a measly 13.something miles.  It really is a mind over matter kind of thing.  There is no reason that I can’t. Except maybe tripping and breaking a bone somewhere along the way…



I’ve been reading a number of blogs that “runners” have written.  I’m more nervous about having to stop to use the bathroom than anything else.  I know that’s kind of TMI but I’m being honest here.  Last weekend I ran a 5K and came in 2^nd place in my age group and 10^th overall for Females.  Kind of awesome I know and I really hate to brag but I was pretty good that day.  I even set a PR of 27:50.  Yes it was a small race but I accomplished something! Not to mention it was a flipping 38 degrees at start time and the wind was blowing 25 mph.  Landon was even kind enough to run as well.  He set a PR also! Way to go Babe. 



I’m like 98% excited, 1% nervous, and 1% scared about this half-marathon on March 10^th.  I more scared of letting myself down more than anything.  I promise to keep blogging about progress made towards the date. 



 

2 Years Ago Today!

Two years ago today, I started the most amazing journey.  I began my journey walking out of a front door, down an aisle lined with flowers and tea lights, and to an alter surrounded by the best family and friends a woman could ask for.  Standing at the end of was my husband-to-be.

I feel like I've been married to Landon for a lifetime.  We go together like peanut butter and jelly.  It's funny how we compliment each other.  I'm terrible at math (like have to count on my fingers kind of terrible) and he can't spell worth a flip.  We both like our hamburgers the same way...mustard and pickles only. We both find getting in bed at 8 o'clock an eventful evening and that was even pre-Jaxson. 

It's remarkable to me how some people can consider marriage to be the end of your "good times" in life.  My life has improved 100% since being married.  I've thought about this post for a solid month and right now I have no words to describe my happiness.  Landon, thank you for being the perfect best friend and husband I could have ever dreamed of having.  I love you to the moon and back. 

I was "Hip" once....

Even I am having a hard time making myself believe it, but yes, I once was "hip", "cool", even "stylish".  I think I've lost it.  I found wrinkles under my eyes!!!  This is probably worse than finding a gray hair in my book. According to Johnny Depp's character in Alice in Wonderland, I've lost my muchness.  I am desperately trying to find my muchness really quick.  According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, muchness means "the quality or state of being in great quantity, extent, or degree." What the Mad Hatter was talking about, in his odd and slightly delirious way, was that Alice had lost some of who she used to be. He was inferring that she had lost some of the true essence of herself as she'd grown older.  So how am I going to get my muchness back?? 

Step 1:  Paint my toes any color EXCEPT for pink or red.  I think this one will do just fine thank you. 

Step 2:  Go skydiving.  I haven’t told Landon this one yet but I think I’m going to make it happen.  Babe, if you’re reading this, I’m sorry I haven’t told you my plan a little earlier. 

Step 3:  Cut my hair off.  Again, this may come as a shock to my husband, SORRY!!!

Step 4:  Listen to Katy Perry a little more.  This girl is the true definition of muchness.  I’m going to go ahead and throw Little Wayne into the mix as well just to keep it fresh.

Step 5:  Start cooking a little more.  I stopped and I really don’t know why.  I used to live with my nose in a cookbook.  I need to start experimenting with spices again. 

I’m not sure exactly if these five steps are going to help me reclaim my muchess but I feel like I’m going to have fun doing it.  I want Jaxson to never feel like his mom is “old”.  I felt this way about my mom probably only 3 times in my 28 years but I was quick on my feet to do something to change those feelings.  Most of the time I just helped her to pick out another outfit before she walked out the door and it worked!!!    

Catchin' Up!

So things have been happening lately and I've failed to write about them.  I'm going to play a game of Catch Up with you.

We bought a boat!  For the longest time, my hubby has been talking about getting a boat.  He wanted something big enough that Jaxson and I could tag along and go for rides with him.  About a month ago he asked pretty please and I said yes.  How can you deny a man when he says "pretty please"! On a side note, I probably enjoy the boat just as much, if not more, than he does.  We've taken Jaxson on the boat 3 times.  Not a big fan of his life jacket but he wears it without a fuss.  He has found that early morning fishing excursions are the best for napping.  Landon and I took him fishing last Sunday morning.  We crawled out of bed at the wee hour of 4:30 to load the boat.  We woke Jaxson up right before we left.  Talk about confused!!  Not only was it still dark when we left the house, but I left him in his pajamas to ride out to Keith Lake.  In fact, I left him in his PJ's the whole time!!!  Once we arrived at our first fishing spot, I cracked open a Nutrigrain bar for Jaxson to eat for breakfast.  Nothing like breakfast on the water. 

Thirty minutes later the breakfast bar was gone and so was Jaxson.  He fell asleep and didn't wake up until we were about ready to get off the water.  My little man loves to be outside.  I've said it many times that he would sleep outside if I let him and this boat outing proved it!!  Turns out the life jacket makes a pretty good pillow.

Note: To anyone who is about to blast me because his life jacket isn’t zipped and fastened:

                                                                             1) the boat was stopped and anchored

                                                                             2) the boat was turned off

                                                                             3) this was a photo opportunity

                                                                            4) the rest of the ride it was fastened

Another new item we have added to the Wright house, specifically to Jaxson's room, is a toddler rail for his crib.  I'm sure I've written about this before but we are struggling with Jaxson to sleep in his own room.  I am an enabler.  I admit my mistakes.  I haven’t been firm with this sleeping in your own bed deal.  I gave up trying to get him to fall asleep on his own in his own room.  I then gave up trying to move him into his crib because he would wake up every time I laid him down in his bed.  I don’t let him cry it out.  It hurts me just as much as he thinks it is hurting him.  SO my solution was to basically make his crib into a big boy bed so that I could lie in HIS room with him until he fell asleep and then ever so softly crawl out and into my bed.  The only glitch in this perfect scenario is Jaxson’s exit strategy.  Instead of sliding out of the side of the bed when he wakes up, he tries to crawl HEAD FIRST over the toddler rail, resulting in what could be a head injury.  I’ve already been to the emergency room one time in the past 2 months for what we thought was a head injury and I’m not going back.  I guess we are going back to a full crib.  Plan failed!

I am patiently awaiting Jaxson to form words.  He's a busy little boy with a whole lot to say, he just doesn't know exactly how to pronounce it yet.  Mama and Dada are pretty much concrete in his dictionary and I think he either says Nana or Nene (one of his grandmothers and his caregiver) but nothing further.  My dog is about to have a nervous breakdown.  For the first couple of days after Jaxson's birth, I struggled with the relationship (or lack thereof) that the dog would have with him.  Boy I was so wrong about this.  Poor thing can't even retreat to her safe place (her kennel) without Jaxson bombarding her.  Jaxson is growing taller by the day.  He can reach things that I'm not ready for him to reach just yet.  I'm about to label the kitchen a danger zone.  All items have to be moved to the center of the kitchen table.  Little fingers can reach a plate of food in no time! 

I have a bagillion pictures that I need to upload and post one day.  If definitely would have helped with this whole catchin up idea I had. 

+1 for the Angels

Yesterday was a very scary day for my family.  My mom was in a car accident.  She is alright, pretty bruised and banged up though. 

I took a late lunch yesterday, around 2:30, and was on the phone with my insurance company.  I was trying to get some matters straightened out when my dad beeps in on call waiting.  I hate being left on hold when calling insurance companies so I clicked over told my dad that I would call him right back and when right back to the insurance people.  I called Dad about 3 minutes later and heard those horrible words, "Mom has been in an accident".  Instantly I panicked.  Not my mother, I need my mother.  She has to be alright, nothing ever stops my mom.  I ran into my office told my supervisor that I'd be leaving to go to the hospital.  I got a text message from my sister, Kaitlyn, who works at the hospital that the ambulance was taking Mom.  She said she was waiting in the ER for her to arrive and she didn't know what happened.  The drive to Beaumont seemed to take FOREVER.  Hello…. 20 minutes that seemed like 2 hours.  I called Dad again.  He said he spoke to Mom on the phone.  Praise Jesus at least she was conscious and talking.  I remembered a story I read, I think it was a Nicholas Sparks book, about a woman getting chopped in half by a car and she was still able to talk to her husband on the phone and tell him she loved him just by the adrenaline in her body keeping her alive.  I let my mind get the best of me sometimes. 

I arrived at the ER and my sister brought me to the slot my mom was stuck in.  Relief…SHE WAS OK!!!  Of course it's tough to see your mother strapped down on a board with a neck brace so big that she could only move her eyes to see me.  If you know my mother at all, she dresses very appropriately for her age and profession and yesterday was no exception.  She makes laying on a backboard look good.  She had on cute white capris, a flowery springy shirt and some cute tan wedges.  Who knew my mother wore wedges.  I respected the situation we were in and didn’t take any photos so this is a photo-less post.  Sorry! 

Beaumont PD came to visit my mom while we were waiting on the doctor to assess the damages.  She told her side of the story and it was pretty scary.  There was defiantly an angel riding in the car her.  By the grace of God, both she and the other driver walked away with minor injuries.  There was no blood, just tears.   Mom’s car is totaled but that can be easily replaced. +1 for the Angels, 0 for Satan!!!  We aren’t sure why the other driver ran the red light causing the wreck.  I’m not making any assumptions, just a plea to all the other drivers on the road.  Pay attention to your surroundings, do not text and drive, do not Facebook and drive, and stay off of your phone unless it’s an emergency. 

Mom was released from the hospital last night and was able to try to rest in the comfort of her own bed.  Everything is OK! 

Discipling Your Child

I've started reading and researching different methods of discipline.  Jaxson is one year old and knows exactly how to push my buttons.  He knows the word "NO" and that he shouldn't be doing something when I yell it but so far this "NO" word that he keeps hearing coming from my mouth doesn't result in any consequences. 

con·se·quence

   /ˈkɒn sɪˌkwɛns, -kwəns/  [kon-si-kwens, -kwuh ns]  

–noun

1.

the effect, result, or outcome of something occurring earlier

I had to look up the word consequence in the dictionary because I know it was a result of something happening but my suspicions are correct.  A consequence doesn't always have to be BAD.  In the disciplining world, however, it does. 

As a child and through my adolescent and early 20 something years, I swore that I would have a different approach at discipline than my parents did.  My philosophy was "let them figure out that bad choices come with bad consequences" on their own.  This philosophy has come to a complete HALT now that my child is alive. Today I briefly browsed the internet to find articles on discipline a one year old.  If other people have good ideas, I shouldn't have to reinvent the wheel on this.  My thoughts are rapidly changing after reading the first article.  Let me summarize......

"Ages 0 to 2

Babies and toddlers are naturally curious. So it's wise to eliminate temptations and no-nos — items such as TVs and video equipment, stereos, jewelry, and especially cleaning supplies and medications should be kept well out of reach."

PULHEASE!!! You are telling me that I need to pack my house up in a box and live with NOTHING.  I have successfully kept him away from medications and housecleaning supplies with cabinet locks and catches but the TV...really? 

 "When your crawling baby or roving toddler heads toward an unacceptable or dangerous play object, calmly say "No" and either remove your child from the area or distract him or her with an appropriate activity."

What am I supposed to do know...I've removed him from the area but I'm still needing what to do next.....hello???

"It's important to not spank, hit, or slap a child of any age. Babies and toddlers are especially unlikely to be able to make any connection between their behavior and physical punishment. They will only feel the pain of the hit."

I guess nobody showed this article to my Dad when I was younger.  Pain was his middle name....I'm pretty sure I knew the difference between pain from my behavior and physical punishment though.  And let me also add this….if they didn’t feel the pain from the hit, they won’t remember the CONSQUENCE from their action. 

This article was no help. 

On to Dr. Phil’s advice.

1. Commit Yourself: It's crucial that your child knows that you're going to do what you say you will. If you explain what a punishment will be, and then don't act on it, you will have less credibility the next time. Make a commitment to your child's discipline, and be consistent in your behavior toward them.

YES!!! I just told Landon yesterday that WE need to be consistent with me telling Jaxson “NO” on certain behaviors, i.e. squirting your sippy cup of water on the mat by the back door. 

2. Be Realistic in Your Expectations of Your Child.
Don't ask your child to do anything he/she cannot do. Make sure that what you are asking of your child is a behavior within his or her reach — if it's not, your child will get frustrated and be less likely to listen to you in the future.

Ok Dr. Phil I will remember this in about a year.

3. Define Your Child's Currency.
Find out what your child values — it could be a toy, a particular activity, or even a privilege like getting to stay awake to a particular hour. Dr Phil explains: "If you control the currency, you control the behavior that currency depends on." Once you understand what your child values, you can withdraw positive things (taking away the toy) or introduce negative things (making them take a time-out) as a form of discipline.

Still trying to figure this one out.  I know Jaxson values his baseball.  But if I take that away, he still has a bagillion more toys to pick from. 

4. Give Your Children Predictable Consequences.
It's important for your child to understand that the same result will come from the same behavior. Make your child feel like he/she has control over their life: If your child behaves in "Way A," they need to be sure that they will always get "Consequence B." If he/she can count on the rules staying the same, they're more likely to abide by

them.

This sounds like a tag-along to pointer #1.

I’m a pushover when it comes to my child.  He has this look on his face that says..”Mommy I’m sorry and I promise to never do it again…until you’re not looking”.  I have one hope when it comes to disciplining my children (I’m making this plural because I’m assuming there will be more in the future).  I hope that I can stand firm with my rules and not give to way to cute little boys that try to make it all go away by hugging my legs. 

Just Keep Swimming

 I knew it no other way.  I have trusted my Mom and Dad from the beginning.  I may have DOUBTED them quite frequently, but I've always trusted them.  It's comforting to me as a mother to know that my child trusts me.  He is only a year old, and you may think he doesn't know trusting from not, but I think differently.  I have had to work really hard for the past year to earn his trust and I will have to work 10 times as hard to maintain this trust forever.  

Jaxson and I started a "Mommy and Me" swimming class this week.  I'm going to be blunt about this.  My kid is an excellent beginner swimmer.  He doesn't necessarily know the mechanics of swimming just yet but we are well on our way.  On our first day of class we basically were working on becoming familiar with being in water.  

Jaxson has always been very comfortable with his baths but has never been so adventurous as to put his face in the water yet.  That's what I'm hoping to get out of him with this first year of swimming.  We mainly spend most of our time floating on his tummy and trying to float on the back.  This is how I know I have his trust.  Swimming pools are intimidating when you’re submerged all the way to your shoulders in water.  

With only a couple of freak out moments, Jaxson has allowed me to guide him across the pool without question.  I have dunked him a half a dozen times with only a couple of "What the heck" looks shoot across his face!  Jaxson has learned to walk in the water along the steps of the pool.  He plays with dive rings on the steps.  He's a natural.