+1 for the Angels

Yesterday was a very scary day for my family.  My mom was in a car accident.  She is alright, pretty bruised and banged up though. 

I took a late lunch yesterday, around 2:30, and was on the phone with my insurance company.  I was trying to get some matters straightened out when my dad beeps in on call waiting.  I hate being left on hold when calling insurance companies so I clicked over told my dad that I would call him right back and when right back to the insurance people.  I called Dad about 3 minutes later and heard those horrible words, "Mom has been in an accident".  Instantly I panicked.  Not my mother, I need my mother.  She has to be alright, nothing ever stops my mom.  I ran into my office told my supervisor that I'd be leaving to go to the hospital.  I got a text message from my sister, Kaitlyn, who works at the hospital that the ambulance was taking Mom.  She said she was waiting in the ER for her to arrive and she didn't know what happened.  The drive to Beaumont seemed to take FOREVER.  Hello…. 20 minutes that seemed like 2 hours.  I called Dad again.  He said he spoke to Mom on the phone.  Praise Jesus at least she was conscious and talking.  I remembered a story I read, I think it was a Nicholas Sparks book, about a woman getting chopped in half by a car and she was still able to talk to her husband on the phone and tell him she loved him just by the adrenaline in her body keeping her alive.  I let my mind get the best of me sometimes. 

I arrived at the ER and my sister brought me to the slot my mom was stuck in.  Relief…SHE WAS OK!!!  Of course it's tough to see your mother strapped down on a board with a neck brace so big that she could only move her eyes to see me.  If you know my mother at all, she dresses very appropriately for her age and profession and yesterday was no exception.  She makes laying on a backboard look good.  She had on cute white capris, a flowery springy shirt and some cute tan wedges.  Who knew my mother wore wedges.  I respected the situation we were in and didn’t take any photos so this is a photo-less post.  Sorry! 

Beaumont PD came to visit my mom while we were waiting on the doctor to assess the damages.  She told her side of the story and it was pretty scary.  There was defiantly an angel riding in the car her.  By the grace of God, both she and the other driver walked away with minor injuries.  There was no blood, just tears.   Mom’s car is totaled but that can be easily replaced. +1 for the Angels, 0 for Satan!!!  We aren’t sure why the other driver ran the red light causing the wreck.  I’m not making any assumptions, just a plea to all the other drivers on the road.  Pay attention to your surroundings, do not text and drive, do not Facebook and drive, and stay off of your phone unless it’s an emergency. 

Mom was released from the hospital last night and was able to try to rest in the comfort of her own bed.  Everything is OK! 

Discipling Your Child

I've started reading and researching different methods of discipline.  Jaxson is one year old and knows exactly how to push my buttons.  He knows the word "NO" and that he shouldn't be doing something when I yell it but so far this "NO" word that he keeps hearing coming from my mouth doesn't result in any consequences. 

con·se·quence

   /ˈkɒn sɪˌkwɛns, -kwəns/  [kon-si-kwens, -kwuh ns]  

–noun

1.

the effect, result, or outcome of something occurring earlier

I had to look up the word consequence in the dictionary because I know it was a result of something happening but my suspicions are correct.  A consequence doesn't always have to be BAD.  In the disciplining world, however, it does. 

As a child and through my adolescent and early 20 something years, I swore that I would have a different approach at discipline than my parents did.  My philosophy was "let them figure out that bad choices come with bad consequences" on their own.  This philosophy has come to a complete HALT now that my child is alive. Today I briefly browsed the internet to find articles on discipline a one year old.  If other people have good ideas, I shouldn't have to reinvent the wheel on this.  My thoughts are rapidly changing after reading the first article.  Let me summarize......

"Ages 0 to 2

Babies and toddlers are naturally curious. So it's wise to eliminate temptations and no-nos — items such as TVs and video equipment, stereos, jewelry, and especially cleaning supplies and medications should be kept well out of reach."

PULHEASE!!! You are telling me that I need to pack my house up in a box and live with NOTHING.  I have successfully kept him away from medications and housecleaning supplies with cabinet locks and catches but the TV...really? 

 "When your crawling baby or roving toddler heads toward an unacceptable or dangerous play object, calmly say "No" and either remove your child from the area or distract him or her with an appropriate activity."

What am I supposed to do know...I've removed him from the area but I'm still needing what to do next.....hello???

"It's important to not spank, hit, or slap a child of any age. Babies and toddlers are especially unlikely to be able to make any connection between their behavior and physical punishment. They will only feel the pain of the hit."

I guess nobody showed this article to my Dad when I was younger.  Pain was his middle name....I'm pretty sure I knew the difference between pain from my behavior and physical punishment though.  And let me also add this….if they didn’t feel the pain from the hit, they won’t remember the CONSQUENCE from their action. 

This article was no help. 

On to Dr. Phil’s advice.

1. Commit Yourself: It's crucial that your child knows that you're going to do what you say you will. If you explain what a punishment will be, and then don't act on it, you will have less credibility the next time. Make a commitment to your child's discipline, and be consistent in your behavior toward them.

YES!!! I just told Landon yesterday that WE need to be consistent with me telling Jaxson “NO” on certain behaviors, i.e. squirting your sippy cup of water on the mat by the back door. 

2. Be Realistic in Your Expectations of Your Child.
Don't ask your child to do anything he/she cannot do. Make sure that what you are asking of your child is a behavior within his or her reach — if it's not, your child will get frustrated and be less likely to listen to you in the future.

Ok Dr. Phil I will remember this in about a year.

3. Define Your Child's Currency.
Find out what your child values — it could be a toy, a particular activity, or even a privilege like getting to stay awake to a particular hour. Dr Phil explains: "If you control the currency, you control the behavior that currency depends on." Once you understand what your child values, you can withdraw positive things (taking away the toy) or introduce negative things (making them take a time-out) as a form of discipline.

Still trying to figure this one out.  I know Jaxson values his baseball.  But if I take that away, he still has a bagillion more toys to pick from. 

4. Give Your Children Predictable Consequences.
It's important for your child to understand that the same result will come from the same behavior. Make your child feel like he/she has control over their life: If your child behaves in "Way A," they need to be sure that they will always get "Consequence B." If he/she can count on the rules staying the same, they're more likely to abide by

them.

This sounds like a tag-along to pointer #1.

I’m a pushover when it comes to my child.  He has this look on his face that says..”Mommy I’m sorry and I promise to never do it again…until you’re not looking”.  I have one hope when it comes to disciplining my children (I’m making this plural because I’m assuming there will be more in the future).  I hope that I can stand firm with my rules and not give to way to cute little boys that try to make it all go away by hugging my legs. 

Just Keep Swimming

 I knew it no other way.  I have trusted my Mom and Dad from the beginning.  I may have DOUBTED them quite frequently, but I've always trusted them.  It's comforting to me as a mother to know that my child trusts me.  He is only a year old, and you may think he doesn't know trusting from not, but I think differently.  I have had to work really hard for the past year to earn his trust and I will have to work 10 times as hard to maintain this trust forever.  

Jaxson and I started a "Mommy and Me" swimming class this week.  I'm going to be blunt about this.  My kid is an excellent beginner swimmer.  He doesn't necessarily know the mechanics of swimming just yet but we are well on our way.  On our first day of class we basically were working on becoming familiar with being in water.  

Jaxson has always been very comfortable with his baths but has never been so adventurous as to put his face in the water yet.  That's what I'm hoping to get out of him with this first year of swimming.  We mainly spend most of our time floating on his tummy and trying to float on the back.  This is how I know I have his trust.  Swimming pools are intimidating when you’re submerged all the way to your shoulders in water.  

With only a couple of freak out moments, Jaxson has allowed me to guide him across the pool without question.  I have dunked him a half a dozen times with only a couple of "What the heck" looks shoot across his face!  Jaxson has learned to walk in the water along the steps of the pool.  He plays with dive rings on the steps.  He's a natural.